Stacey Dash recently stopped by Jamie Foxx’s Foxxhole radio show on Sirius to chop it up about marriage and dating, among other things. During the interview, Stacey mentioned that she had sex with all 3 of her husbands on the first date, something that goes directly against common dating advice. To paraphrase, she said she wouldn’t marry someone with whom the sex isn’t good, and she wants to find out early if the D is good. And I can’t say I blame her in that regard.

I wouldn’t have sex with someone on the first date…but I don’t follow common dating advice that says to wait three months to have sex with a guy either. That’s just too long. If I’m seeing a new person and we haven’t had sex by three months of dating, it’s likely that it won’t happen and we’ll just end up being friends.

Every person is different, it just depends on the comfort level between the man and woman, and the rapport they’ve built with each other. I want to know sooner rather than later what I’d be getting into sexually with a person. If the sex is bad, then I’ll know we can’t date, because good sexual chemistry is important to me. But if the D is good, and we have a good rapport with one another, I’d think “this could be love.” :*D

To those who will say its whorish to have sex with someone on the first date, or within the first month of dating a guy, remember that time isn’t the measure of a whore. Time is arbitrary. The measure of ho is when a woman doesn’t have anything of value to offer except sex, which she uses to garner and sustain male attention.

So readers, share your thoughts on this one. Sex on the first date? Yes ? No? Only in Miami? Leave comments!

Image borrowed from Alphanista.com

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I asked my friend Google what the deal was, and came up with a few adorable, budget-friendly options!

Redopin High Waist Skirt $48, YesStyle

Button Front High Waist Skirt, Urban Outfitters $48

Lipsy Bow Tulip Bow Skirt ASOS $27.35

High Waist Military Skirt ASOS $27.35

Lauren Conrad image from California Style Online

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Last week, at church with my mom and sis (I’ve fulfilled my church attendance quota for 2010 by attending one service..heathen!) my mom saw this chick rocking super shiny, chrome nail color. “Toi!” she said. “Look at that girl’s polish! It’s so cute!” I said, “I think she’s wearing Minx stencils. I’ve seen celebs wearing them on the fashion blogs.” Moms was like, “Well, find out where they sell it, and get me some!”

She was so urgent and insistent, I had to find out where she can get Minxed, stat. Upon a little bit of research, I found that Minx is a sticker-like  nail covering containing all types of cool designs. It’s applied directly to your nails, but its not polish. The Minx website recommends having a certified professional apply the product, and offers a list of certified salons across the US and Internationally. All Lacquered Up has a great review of one woman’s Minx experience, check out the post.

Me and Moms aren’t interested in overpaying to have shiny, chrome gold nails, so I’ll just find the goldest gold at Alice’s Beauty Supply on Crenshaw. We’ll just take the Minx inspiration!

Would you get Minxed? Share your thoughts in the comments!

Image: David Scott Salon & Spa News

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Cheers 2 U was one of my favorite songs of the Timbaland/Blackground era, it was one of those songs you would dedicate to your boo on the radio. Or you would order the video on The Box, call your boo and be like, “I ordered that just for you..” And then your parents would see the charges on their phone bill for ordering music videos on TV, and would put a 1-900 block on the phone.

Enjoy this week’s throwback video, and have a wonderful and blessed weekend! *Besos*

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Remy’s observation on how the rap game only allows one female artist to be hot at any given time is so true….and DAMN! Fat Joe hasn’t reached out since she’s been incarcerated? Whats up with that, Joey Crack? At least Remy doesn’t sound bitter about it. Stay up, Ma!

FREE REMY!

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Spotted @ the Etsy Shop…

Silver Headband

Pheasant Feather Headband

Vintage Hairpins

Gold Feather Bobby Pins

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I had no idea who Kooley High was until I saw them perform at The Spliff last December. I met DJ Ill Digitz before the group began their set, who told me they came to Los Angeles from Raleigh, North Carolina just to perform at the show. I was impressed that they came to LA for the The Spliff, it’s usually a regional show. The Spliff is getting big!

When Kooley High hit the stage, I was really impressed. Their style is dope..a little bit backpack, a little bit country. Their beats are dope, their rhymes are slick, and they have a lady MC. I’m sold!

Ill Digitz passed me a couple of Kooley High CDs. Usually I barely pay attention when unknown artists pass me CDs, but I stashed them in my purse anyway.

I took a listen to their CDs, something I never do. And you know what? I listened to them in their entirety. More than once. Kooley High is one of those acts where if you take a chance on them, you’ll be glad you did it.

Kooley High – Solitude feat. Median

Kooley High – My Shadow

http://www.kooleyhigh.com

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Black hair has always been a political thing. Our hair defines us, and it doesn’t conform to mainstream standards of beauty. Black hair stands out no matter what.

I’ve recently decided to stop pressing my hair. I don’t wear a relaxer, but most of my adult life I’ve been a press + flatiron queen. Years of  excessive heat usage began damaging my hair, so I’ve been experimenting with natural styling techniques from braid outs, to twist outs, to roller sets. Occasionally I hit my roots with the flatiron after a roller set,  but I’m drastically reducing the amount of heat I use on my hair.

The results of my no-heat hair styling techniques have been pretty successful for the most part, but a few styles didn’t turn out so well. My family thinks I’m going through some weird phase because I refuse to press my hair. My grandma thinks I’m going through something, and my mom thinks I’m being anti-establishment. They’re right. I am going through something. I’m tired of damaging my hair to make other people comfortable. My hair goes back to its natural state anyway, so I’m working with it rather than against it.

I haven’t pressed my hair at all in 2010, and my hair is healthier and shinier. I’ve flat ironed the roots a couple of times after a roller set. The small amount of heat applied to the roots after a roller set doesn’t compare to the layers of heat I used to apply to my hair with blow drying, pressing, and flat ironing. I’ve traded mineral oil and petroleum based products for organic coconut oil and olive oil moisturizers. And my hair LOVES it. It drinks up the moisture, coils into beautiful curls, and dances in the wind.

Finding a natural style that works is a journey within itself, but it helps me to listen to my hair and work with it rather than against it. I think we need to have more respect for our hair, and not abuse it with heat and chemicals. We need to cherish what makes us unique.

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My grandmother is a Louisiana girl. Shreveport, to be exact. When she came to California as a teen in the 1940s, she brought her southern recipes with her. I grew up enjoying Gumbo, Shrimp Etoufee, and homemade Jambalaya on a regular basis. Granny took the time to make her dishes from scratch, no Zatarain’s. Although I’ve had my fair share of box Jambalaya. But there’s just something about making a dish from scratch, with fresh ingredients. You can definitely taste the difference.

In the spirit of Fat Tuesday, I decided to create a Cajun dish with my Grandmother’s Louisiana roots in mind. Just because I’m not in New Orleans for Mardi Gras doesn’t mean I can’t celebrate in my own kitchen!

I basically remixed a Jambalaya recipe I found on All Recipes, and adapted it to suit my own tastes. I also had to change it to accommodate the items I had in my fridge, because a chick didn’t go grocery shopping. Lucky for me I always have chicken, shrimp, and smoked sausage on deck. The result is a simple, easy, and delicious stew-like dish. My version is a little bit healthier, since I use smoked turkey sausage in place of the andouille.

Serves 4. You can increase or decrease the proportions accordingly.

Ingredients

• 1/2 lb  skinless, boneless chicken breast – cut into 1 inch cubes
• 1/2 lb smoked turkey sausage, sliced
• 1 can diced tomatoes with juice
• 1/3 large onion, chopped
• 1/3 large green bell pepper, chopped
• 1/3 cup chopped celery
• 4 garlic cloves, minced
• 1/3 cup chicken broth or water
• 2 tsp Cajun seasoning (salt, pepper, cayenne, onion powder, garlic powder, thyme, Italian seasoning)
• 1/2 lb frozen cooked shrimp without tails

Directions

• Sautee veggies until they start to sweat. Add the chicken and smoked sausage.
• Cook until the chicken is no longer pink, about 3 – 4 minutes. Add the Cajun seasoning, canned tomatoes with juice, and chicken brother or water. Stir, and bring to a boil. Reduce heat to a simmer, cover, and let cook for 20 minutes.
• After 20 minutes, add the shrimp. If using cooked shrimp, let it cook for 5 more minutes. If using raw, let it cook for 10 more minutes.
• Taste and adjust seasoning, if necessary.
• Serve over hot white rice.

Image: Woman’s Day

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This video is important for one main reason – this is the only time we’ve ever seen Da Brat dressed in feminine clothing, and not as a butch.  Brat represented herself in this video as a chick that’s sexy without being trashy, and who can FLOW at the same time. She showed that a female emcee doesn’t have to dress like a dude to be lyrically respected. I’m all about embracing femininity, not hiding it…but do you, Brat. Chick had a banging body in this video…there’s no way I would hide that under baggy jeans and timbs!

Enjoy your weekend everyone! I hope you enjoy your Valentine’s Day, and hopefully you have Monday off to recover!

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