Be Choosy About Your “Bad Boy”
I like street dudes. There’s nothing sexier than a man who will shank someone on your behalf, or call the goons to take care of it for him. During my teenage years I had boyfriends who banged, yet treated me like a queen. It was fun and cute then, but not so much now that I’m a grown woman.
As an adult, I still appreciate a man with street tendencies, but he needs to be able to quell it when necessary. If often hear men say they need “a lady in the streets and a freak in the bed.” Well I need a guy who can be a soldier in the streets of life, and can be a man to me and take care of business. I need to be able to take him with me to a classy event, as well as on a run to pick up trees. I see many young women in their early 20s and even older who have much going for themselves, yet still get caught up with the “banger” types like I used to date in high school (ok, and in college a little too). Young women who have education, good jobs, come from good families, and have bright futures ahead of them. With young men whose future may likely entail the streets, jail, or a coffin. There isn’t anything wrong with dating a hood dude, as long as he has a job, is motivated to be successful, and has a plan for his future. But if his future looks bleak, as long as you continue to stay with him, so will yours.
I’m not instructing young women to not consider dating men from dire circumstances. It is entirely possible to find diamonds in the rough. What I am saying is to be mindful of who you spend your time with, consider whether they are adding anything to your life, or bringing you down. If you are with someone and they are headed for destruction, don’t ignore the signs. Ask yourself if that’s what you want for yourself and your future. Even if there is a child involved, you do not have to be stuck. Look out for #1, YOU.
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Tags: black love, dating, relationships
June 16th, 2009 at 4:24 pm
RIP Bodie!
June 17th, 2009 at 8:20 pm
That’s one of those TV deaths we’ll never get over.